Movies: The Depressing Anti-Depressant

I have known something for a long time that I only just revealed to myself tonight. I am an obsessive movie watcher. Well, actually, that's not the revelation. Almost every night of the week I watch movies. But tonight, I truly felt myself let go for more than just a moment. While weeping quite painfully after watching Stranger Than Fiction for a second time, I came to a personally obvious realization.

Movies are my Prozac.

But they don't work THAT well. They give me the release that I can't allow myself in real life. And only while completely isolated do I give myself permission to release my torrent of sadness in the form of uncontrollable tears. I attribute this in part to being a man. It is traditional that men in civilization supress their depression and sadness for the greater good. The sanity of the world. In all honesty, I think that's a bunch of horseshit. I mean I want to NOT believe it. Except that I've never really been able to bawl. Not even when I lose the most important things to me. Except when I gave the Best Man speech at my brother's wedding. I think it was because I knew I was losing him. And I was also guilty for wrecking his car and almost dying in the process. But that's another story. I imagine that when my parents pass that I may not be able to control myself in the slightest. But perhaps I've now created a preconceived condition where it won't be possible to release for the actual event but again I'll have to medicate with the right movie.

Apologies, I digress. Back to the main idea.

Movies are the key to opening my darkest gate. They remind me of things I once had. And may never have again. But I keep hoping that is not the case. Please tell me it's not. Because I really want to believe.

The Taste of Tea directed by Katsuhito Ishii

I just saw this movie tonight at the Imaginasian Theater on 59th Street between 2nd & 3rd Avenues. It was beyond amazing. I am almost at a loss for words to describe the instantaneous affection I have for Mr.Ishii's cinematic masterpiece, but I cannot avoid it's compelling force and therefore must share the joy with you.

The movie is about a family. And all of the fantastic things that they get into. The Manga Artist Mom (Yoshiko), the Sound Mixer Uncle (Ayano), the Go obsessed crush crazy Son (Hajime), the wacky and intensely creative Grandfather (Akira Todoroki), the demure psuedo psychologist father (Nobuo), and the young daughter (Sachiko) who is constantly followed by a giant version of herself. The special effects are absolutely insane. The animation is beautiful and so much fun. The characters force you to invest so much of yourself into the lives that they're living... You have no choice but, as my friend Avery put it so well, to "want to BE that family".

I have never seen anything like it before in my life. It's already got my pre-oscar nod for Best Foreign Film of 2007. It's only at the Imaginasian Theater till March 1st. And I'm not shitting you. You really will miss one of the best movies of your life if you don't see this on the big screen.

Review at:
The Taste of Tea - www.kaijushakedown.com







Personal note:

During the moment in the feature of the 1st picture on the top of this journal. Hajime forced me to a revelation.

In spite of what we may seek within the bounds of human relationships, the only real solace we'll ever have from unrequited affection are the few special moments in our conscious existence when we are unable to resist emotional abandonment of personal reservations and allow ourselves to bask in the glory of our own unique and embelished interpretation of the significance that is contact with another human being in our lives.